I am a quintessential optimistic loser. Just trying to change the loser part....

Saturday, February 6, 2010

Night Before

So its the night before the performance. I'm excited. Probably not as nervous as i should be, but nevertheless kinda nervous. I've never danced on a stage before. So this is something that i'll eventually have to experience. I probably wont feel the fright til i get on stage. But I'll deal with that later.

I've realized im one of those guys thats, ionno sometimes to polite. U know how they tell you nice guys never get girls? Sometimes i find that true. I look back and i feel like i had so many chances, so many girls i had crushes on. But all i ever became was a friend. I wish for once, id meet a girl that because i was a friend, because i understood her, loved me for more than that. Its like with Christina, not only was she the girl i loved, she was the best friend i loved. Damn. She was once in a lifetime, and i blew it. I told her that id never love another girl. I feel like its gunna be true. Even now we have our differences, but i think to myself:"I really fuckin blew it. I really did." If i had the chance right now, id be with her in a heartbeat. Id say yes so damn fast id warp to another dimmension cuz id cause some kinda time barrier shit. But naw. I really wish id meet a nice girl though. And i have no idea where to start. Been so outta the game. I havent been single longer than a month for almost 2 years now. Kinda puts shit in perspective. So many girls right now, id love to just get to know em. But ionno where to start..... Whatever.

My mom told me before that when them time comes, it comes. Its fate. I hope.

PcE

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